At some last blinks

(Gift post)

-Akash Sejpal

I am observing my hands with peeping sight. “Damn, You have been with me for whole life, and remained my partner for all work I have done in my life.” I am moving my hands here and there I don’t know it was with me since 80 years. But today I feel something different to watching it!! Now I am feeling every moment of my life. I don’t know what I am feeling now!! Happy, sad, satisfactory or something something else I don’t know….. I remember all things which I felt in my life, which made me what I am. Which is main reason of all my mornings. When I wake up and knead my eyes it was some childish, some of fancy, some of moral, some of just I wanted to forget.

I still remember those days in my past when I didn’t know how world works and at that time some people around me who smile at me was my world. I always held my momi’s finger and told to her that I want to face out somewhere. I still remember those days when I was kid and my momi took me out every evening when sun started to sunk, My momi took me at temple. It was nice place and privilege to assume that I am the guest of world-holder.

I remember my first day of school slightly. I didn’t know that, why I was there? Why momi didn’t want to stay with me? At that time I just hated my momi for little while. I didn’t know why today her attitude different at me ??? And when I saw that my momi stood out side, I cried and I was put my hands on her body and strike to felt her that, why you did this? It was to difficult to me stayed without you!!!

It was great phase of my life, while I was studied with many students and teachers at many places.There were many people which can’t forget Specially friends. Those were so stupid things but it was really nostalgia moment of my life. They cared me as my parents, who understood me more than my parents, who used abuse word, who insulted me, but still cared more than anyone around me. They insult you, they hit you, abuse you, but still never let you down!!!!!

During teenage I didn’t know but I felt fancy about some one. It is pretty fantastic feeling to being in love with someone. In peculiar way she had introduced me to myself. I still remember all those moments I breathed with her in late evening, at those benches. Where we used to sit together and observe sunset. I still remember the way I used to caress your floating hair in symphony of breezing wind.

When I became father, at that moment I felt like I have born again. Sometime my child used to do same thing I habituated in my childhood. It was undeniably extra ordinary pleasure. The way she looked at me with her innocent little eyes for some infinite answer of a unspoken questions peeping out from her smile. The way she hugged me, warm enough to feel, tight enough to be sure of my presence. When she used to fall sleep on my chest, to listen her breathing was the most adorable thing I have done in my entire life.

During that phase I was totally changed. I accustomed live for my family, without thinking about myself. I still don’t know how that you happy-I happy, you sad-I sad phenomena  work. But I know one thing for sure, is that that Phenomena does work in most cases.

Strangely my legs are freezing down. I can’t feel it. I can’t stretch it. In no more time perhaps my whole body is going to be freeze. Enshrining your memories can give me warmth in this freezing moments, but I think its time to move toward eternal truth.

Thank you for everything.

Akash Sejpal, A friend of mine had sent it, perhaps 2-2.5 years before. I liked it, so I asked him origin of those words, about writer. And surprisingly he replied, “It’s me”

Well, He is not writer OR May be he is. He is not photographer OR may be he is. He is  not Scientist OR may be he is. Perhaps he is all those aforementioned characteristics.


There are many grammatical mistakes I am reckoning  now, but still I think it is better not to interfere in his worlds, in his feelings which is flowing through those lines. I have make few changes, but above that, everything is as it is. Sometimes when we standardise sentences, there might have possibilities of losing touch of those words. I believe that feelings matters, above grammar and all that.


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